Story of My Niqab/Hijab Part 1

muslim women

Me with a horshey at a beach in Pakistan

Let me tell you, I wasn’t always a niqabi. I started wearing niqab in the year I turned 18, that’s like 3 years ago. No one forced me to do it no one paid me to do it; it was something that I just felt like doing.

Before I started to cover my face permanently, I was like any other teenager, loved to sing, dance, watch movies, go crazy in hang-outs and all that. Well, I still love all these, but, now I’ve learnt to control myself.

When I was 13, in grade 8, I used to study in co-education and I did NOT wear hijab or dress Islamically in any way. I used to wear short sleeves too. And did not mind hanging out with guys either. Although, I did pray five times a day, daily Alhamdulillah and was also reading Qura’an with translation. But the thought of covering never occurred to me. Let me also tell you, in grade 7, I used to dream of becoming a Miss Universe. Lol. I know it’s ironic but it’s true.

In grade 10, I, along with a group of friends decided to make an underground band. (Another ironic reality). See, that’s how lost and astray I was.

My parents were never strict when it came to religion, they barely scolded me for not praying and never asked me to cover, but from an early age my mom DID use to take me to weekly Islamic lectures and gatherings, which at least gave me something to ponder at later.

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The idea to cover according to exact rules of Islam used to bug me from the time I turned 16 in grade 11. I used to think what was going on with the Islamic world? Why have the Muslims become such hypocrites? Why is today’s Muslim so scared to be himself? Along with that the verses of Quran used to ring in my ears about how non-believers will be thrown into hell fire.

But, all the time I kept on finding excuses to not wear it. Because, you see it’s not just about covering your face while going out in front of men but it requires you to do more than that. Like, staying away from evil things which promote vulgarity in society such as songs and movies. It also required you to be pious in every way of life. You had to learn to be kind, and generous to everyone, which meant getting rid of the bitchy attitude. You had to learn to speak the truth all the time (it’s not like I was a huge liar earlier, lol). Limit your social activities and most of all cover in front of your cousins too! (That was the MOST difficult part for me, as I always used to be the odd one out in family gatherings).

So, I first started off by simple easy steps.

1) Tried to cut down listening to music.

2) Tried to stay in control in hang-outs and get-togethers when all I wanted to do was go crazy with the beats.

3) Controlled back-biting others.

So, on the final day of grade 12 meet up, I surprised my friends with a niqab and honestly I did not get a very supportive response. Nobody SAID anything on my face, but I could get the vibes.

But, I really didn’t care, because I knew I was doing the right thing, and I didn’t mind being singled out for something which was 101% right.

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Plus that’s what I like, to be different, anything but ordinary (in a good way ONLY), to be able to create new trends.

That wasn’t it. Six months later, I got a job to teach grade 10 students (boys & girls), and things changed a bit. For the first week I tried to keep up with my commitment of niqab but after a week I was led astray again by the devil with thousands of excuses for screwing the niqab for a while, and I removed it. May Allah forgive me.

After one year of teaching, I had found answers to all my excuses and let me tell you one thing, all those people who say covering JUST the hair prevents you from fitnah, they are WRONG. Covering your face holds as much importance, as covering your hair and body, because the face holds the real beauty.

To be continued…….

P.S. Some inspiring stories of converted Muslims:

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5 responses to “Story of My Niqab/Hijab Part 1

  1. Assalamualaikum, this story is very inspiring. Are you from the USA ? If so, in high school, how did the people in your clubs and organizations you were involved in react to you when they had seen you with niqab?

    • Walaikum as salaam sister! Thanks so much for the lovely comment.
      And no I’m not from USA and I’m sad to say even then I faced allot of negative reactions from my friends even though we were brought up amongst Muslims in Saudi Arabia. Its really difficult in the beginning but you’ve got to hold on tightly to your faith and trust Allah and pray to make wearing niqab easier for you. 🙂

      • Assalamualaikum, shukran for replying. I would like to know what grade you began wearing the niqab? And if you were in any high school clubs or organizations, how did people in those clubs treat you when they saw you wear the niqab? And how do you respond to your parents if they call you radical or say that you disappoint them? Please keep the responses coming as I would like to use your responses to help me. I really want to wear the niqab and I live in USA where it’s very hard to be a Muslim because of the level of haram here. I need some heavy advice to strengthen me in making my decision. I definitely want to wear the niqab because I don’t want anyone to take a picture of me and make a statue of me or hang my picture in their homes now or after my death, because that is worshipping me. I also want to wear it because we were hijab to cover our beauty and my face is a big part of my beauty. Also, some women wore the niqab during the time of prophet Muhammad pbuh, even Aicha ra. I don’t care if people view me as extreme. I care about pleasing Allah and wearing niqab is necessary for me because I don’t want men to be seduced by my beauty. Please answer my questions above and get back to me!

      • MashaAllah I really like how motivated you are. May Allah ease your hardship and always keep you on this path.
        I started it after high school as I mentioned it in the article and let me tell you, I cried allot when my parents criticized me for wearing it like for a day or two and kept on praying to Allah to give me strength which helped allot.
        The best thing to do would be to surround yourself with people who have strong faith. Get closer and closer to Allah. Recite Quran, listen to lectures and try to switch to Islamic institute. As the circle of friends we have matters alot, if we stay with people who aren’t practicing Muslims we tend to become like them even if we don’t want to, that’s why choosing the company of people to be with plays very important role.

  2. MashaAllah, a really nice post dear Javeria.. I am not a Niqabi or Hijabi but I love those girls who did.. even my best friend Maria is always wearing abaya at university..May Allah paak bless you with loads of happiness & goodness!
    Fi amaan Allah..

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